it's that ancient love, that you won't outgrow

Firstly, I hope you all enjoyed Christmas as much as I did?!
A couple of days before Christmas I did manage to skid my way up to the hairdressers and do thiiiiis


I also got to see my beautiful girls, where we took a trip to the german market in Birmingham - and ate the worlds nicest garlic bread - then had a night out in my native Worcester - where we drank the worlds nicest pitchers. Why do all my adventures involve consuming food of some kind? 

Anyway, as for Christmas day itself I certainly had a beautiful day avec le fam, and ate my body weight in fruit cake and wenslydale, and realized how odd some of my family really are, and watched TV you wouldn't watch at any other time of the year, and wore an awful jumper, and took photographs of the snow (which I haven't uploaded yet because I was far too busy, you know, being festive) and ate even more food. Festive photos to come, in time.
And I know Christmas isn't about the presents but I really did receive some gorgeous presents this year, my darling being this
lomography diana f+ dreamer camera
which I have only been saving up for for, ooh, 2 years? My parents found it painful to watch, and gave in.

To be honest, the best thing about this Christmas has been being home. It sounds soppy, but what with this being the first time I've lived anywhere but the house I grew up in, it is nice to know it is always here for me to come back to. Family is what its all about really

Any Christmas revelations from you lot? Did any of you receive a favorite gift, or do something beautiful? Under one week until new years!!


how could i dance with another?

This is my best friend.

 Isn't she fantastic?

 yes, yes she is.



sleigh bells ring

...are you listening? 

Merry Christmas! 
I am so incredibly happy to be at home! I intend to rid my life of all that stress, and then never let it back in.
Hope every single one of you, my lovely hoarde of adorable subscribers (all 22 of you at last count! I can tick that off my list) has a heartwarming, beautiful christmas and a happy new year! here's to all our wishes coming true.

(all photos from tumblr, not taken by me. all to happy to give credit where due)


all the colours of benetton.

I'm not worried.
This is only, what, 3 years of my life?
Well I intend to be alive for at least another 60, please. Perspective, innit.


new and unexpected exercises in self-restraint

I'm very sorry if you are sick of my Zara-obsession.
Actually, no, I'm not. I know you love it. ;)

I'm so in love with the top on, it's unreal.

Zara Brocade Dress, £39.99
Zara Studio Dress, £89.99
Zara Printed Dress, £39.99

Also, I am so glad that this exists. It's like a Vaudeville Show inside your computer!! And if you have five minutes, and if you trust me even a little bit, you will click the above link and enjoy the visual feast that will take over your computer. Lush.

I'm off to finish my essay, then collect a parcel from the Royal Mail depot. Living on the edge. ;)


its right hard to remember that on a day like today

If there is one thing I miss about school/college, it is structure. I don't like having unstructured days, the whole floaty-student schedule thing suits some people here down to the ground but I just want to be busy busy busy all day, and I don't know why but I just really kind of miss the rigidity of it all. I don't mean it was tedious or repetitive in a monotonous way; while I certainly don't miss getting up at 7am on frosty mornings for school, even college was structured in a looser way. I should probably have known uni wouldn't feel like that!

I feel like I'm waiting, waiting for something big to happen. And there was a time when I just assumed it would be leaving home.
It wasn't.
But thats fine, of course it wouldn't be the first thing that came along.
So I'm still waiting, and actually (on good days) I'm massively excited about the future..having a job, a career, a life.

Its like there is a constant massive battle between what I should do, should say, should think, and reality. It's should vs is.
Well I realise that that has to stop. It doesn't matter what should be, there is only what IS, and think of all the potential you're missing out on because you've got your head turned the other way. Stop feeling inadequate. The past is done, and the future is a little bit scary, so the present is where your head needs to be at, the present is what you live and what you can change.
Give it time.
Stop comparing yourself to other people.
You are coping admirably.
Enjoy every second.
If we said these things to ourselves, every day, how much braver might we be?
Think how proud you're going to be, when this is over
and your life is sussed
and you're achieving the things you want
because you didn't give up
and you can look back on these days as nothing more than memories.
Hopefully, fond ones.

(If you read all this, I heart you.)


general catch up

things I am excited about right now:
the fact it is snowing, and i can hear people going batshitcrazy in it outside my window 2 re-reading the beautiful book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathon Safran Foer which is my all time favorite book ever ever ever 3 this movie being announced 4 the fact that Benedict Cumberbatch is on the Corrie ads. As if thats a thing that happened. 5 having a little direction in life 6 reading too much into facebook status updates. (hey it makes me happy to think that post might have been about me) 7 The Rinky Dinks covering arctic monkeys "UKE look good on the dancefloor". yes. 8 knowing for once I have food in the cupboards because I remembered to shop 9 lime shower gel 10 diving into my massive duvet as soon as I finish this.

what are you excited about??



18 before 19.

Inspired by the beautiful
Delightfully Tacky I doodled this list in my diary.. 18 things to do before I turn 19. I have been 18 for an incredible 7 months now (woah there!) so it perhaps would have been more effective if I had made it when I actually had a year to complete these things... oh well!

I wonder if I will manage all these things in the next five months? I can tick a couple off already, but I think its fine if some of them roll over onto my '19 before 20' list
I don't know about you but I have sooooo many long term goals, things like what job I want, and how I envision my life in ten years time, blah blah blah... properly LONG TERM things that I have my whole life to achieve. And often that makes me feel overwhelmed by all the stuff I should be doing to make that perfect life come true. But it seems the truth is you can't plan for the perfect life to happen. I know where I would like to end up, but doing lots of fun little things along the way is what life is actually about, surely.

Enough rambling.

18 before 19 list
1. cut my hair off
2. get, and learn to use, a real film camera
3. break 20 followers on my blog
4. read all the books on my 'books to read' list
5. find a nice boy
learn how to cook a new meal
add to vintage collection
8. learn to type better

9. make a skirt

10. see a band who I really really really like
11. find some high heeled shoes I can walk in

12. tell my best friends how much I love them

13. sort somewhere to live next year

14. finish first look book

15. start a second look book

16. paint a canvas, it's been too long

17. find some vintage babycham glasses

18. feel ok about being at uni
TURN 19!

:) What would your list be??



you and me in a photo booth, 4


apologies for the lack of posts.
my days have been filled with well I don't know what really...a lot of putting off doing essays! But I am determined not to have loads to do over the christmas hols so its go go go from here! you won't see me because i'll be hidden behind all the smoke coming from my pen!

took a trip to Southampton today (about 40mins/an hour on the train from Pompey) to do a spot of crimbo shopping - we may have underestimated how busy it would be on a saturday, 4 weeks before christmas! but it was still a lovely day even if now all I have the energy to do is curl up, eat my body weight in chocolate eclairs and watch I'm a celeb.

today I fell in love with Zara all over again.

feeling a little more festive now; can't wait for mulled wine, stollen and the Pogues!
it is very cold here, but no snow as of yet. what about where you are?


i'm such a worrier

please explain precisely why i really really want one of these?
'Quilted Vintage' Jacket, £99.95, Barbour



need a little time to wake up wake up

I bought white rose fairy lights. As if they were going straight up on the walls.
Also today I managed to check a book out of the library and do laundry without any incidents, which is an achievement. How was your day?



introspection sucks, don't do it kids

Tally ho! Was supposed to go to some fireworks tonight, which turned out to not be very good, so we left. It was nice to see people though and so now I am watching QI, doodling in one of my many many many notebooks, drinking tea and making shopping lists.

As a person, I don't feel very defined. You couldn't draw my life. I am too subtle. It doesn't help that I am on a convoluted degree course.
Anyway I'm working on it.

Back home my hair used to mark me out but here its nothing special
so because it is undefined/curls are unpronounced
I'm going to cut my hair
don't know how. I want a fuckoff fringe, like a friend of a friend has.

Also hopefully soon the ballet classes I signed up to will start,
I miss dance being part of my life.
And fingers crossed I get a shiny lomo for christmas,
and next week I will buy pearl lipstick,
and some books that are nothing to do with my work
(and won't feel bad for reading them either)
and although I don't want a job till next year (barwork, please!)
I have at least signed up to hopefully contribute to the student paper

so soon I might be
the girl with the chic backcombed hair
and the sixties makeup
who idly takes photos with her cute camera
and who dances ballet
and reads books on theology, cambridge dons
and the history of ysl

keep those fingers crossed for me, kiddos!



Look! A book, of looks.

All over the last few months of college and throughout this summer I have been working on this lookbook. Every time I finish with a magazine, I go all ninja on it with scissors I accidentally stole from my school art room when I was about 14.

Inspired by a video I saw on a blog, sometime last year.



It is a truly addictive way to waste an afternoon. :)
I have ended up with a huuuugely thick book that I am very proud of. It started off just being fashion, and whilst it largely still is there are also articles, quotes and other images too..
So yeh, bit of a mishmash, and although the book isn't finished yet I am too damn impatient, and I was bored one night so I filmed this. Hope you like it :)

(Don't tell me I don't know how to have fun.)



you and me in a photobooth, 3

I'm going out for a while.
If I'm not back by tomorrow morning, come find me?
(ps I blame the Jacques. not a drink I'd heard of before uni, but apparently its big with students. and apparently I am one of those now. so, hey ho, drink up.)


don't walk that way

I don't know if you've noticed, but its getting colder. A lot, lot colder. Maybe it is because I live by the freezing waters of what I'm pretty sure is the North Atlantic Ocean, at least the English/French channel anyway, but even as an ardent lover of all things winter I am having trouble adjusting to these bitingly cold temperatures. I had to invest in a badass navyblue duffel coat. In it, with my brogues and satchel, I look like a small evacuated child but it is cosy so I don't much mind.

Anyway, soon my thoughts are turning to footwear. My small selection of everyday shoes pretty much spans 3 different types of brogue. Snazzy, but not keeping my tootsies warm! I spy something beginning with...B! Boots! A pair of lovely snuggly warm winter boots.

I may have come to this a little late, but I remembering the last couple of seasons where desert boots started creeping in...and I am attracted!

These beauts are Karen Milan Weekend Luxe Suede ankle boots, £144 in ASOS sale, and you know I'm a sucker for a tassel. ;) But lets not get carried away here, hardly high street prices.
ARTY Moccasin Boots, £65,
Topshop. They're just cute. And kinda ugly. But what is A/W'10 if not a celebration of the frump, in luscious brown suede they look so slouchy and casual. Styling them up might be a challenge, but I'm seeing skinny jeans and an awful lot of cable knit.
Somehow I'm not too impressed with Zara's offering, a wedge ankle boot £59.99. I don't know if its the odd mid-height (is it an ankle boot or a full boot? who knows!) but somehow they look a little too severe. They are still a cute, very Zara approach to the desert boot though, making it their own with the wraparound lace tie.

ANGEL Studded Suede Ankle Boots, £75, Topshop.
These have quite a lot going on, but for a hybrid of all the different booty styles going on at the moment (seems like studs from the biker trend, shape of the desert boot, toe structure of a cowboy boot etc..is that just me?) they are quite a successful piece. I am totally sold on the blocky wooden heel - quite often they look stupid, out of place, like someone has just stuck it on, but here it kind of works.

But - drumroll, please - we have a clear winner. And it's from a slightly unlikely source.
Clarks YARA Desert Boot in black. Isn't she beautiful? See, it's the simple one that wins out. The wedge heel makes the quite masculine desert shoe a little prettier, would look grungy-glamorous with a floral maxi dress, or androdgynous with chinos..I'm in love. At £99 it is the pricier end of the non-designer market, but if I had that kind of ready moolah at my fingertips I would deem them worth it. I called Clarks unlikely not because they haven't had some lovely stock - I still covet a shiny pair of brogues from there, which you know would not fall apart - but just because they don't really have the reputation of being fashion-y, theyre more classic.
So what drew my, and the bloggosphere's attention to these darlings? This darling!

The unstoppable Flo wore the Clarks YARA wedges in the sand colour to Glastonbury this year, and as a result they completely sold out - indeed, they still are! So getting your hands on a pair might be tricky, but good news; it would seem there will be more stock in. If you can wait till December, that is.

None of the above shoes would fill my criteria of snuggly, warm, everyday boots (with the questionable exception of the topshop Arty number?). But they would make you look all warm and wintery and suede-clothed, even if you were still a little nippy. And that is good enough, no?

Ah well.. any suggestions for actual warm and sexy footwear?!

oh, i don't know why


you and me in a photobooth, 2

advance apologies for the beret, but we drank rather a lot of wine last night and I haven't brushed my hair.

Off home for a rare weekend visit! Looking forwards to sparklers, fish and chips, my local pub with some homegirls and of course seeing the fam. Whatever you're up to, have a lovely weekend. :) x


a chanel a day keeps the doctor away

I stood in the newsagents, biting my lip and sighing - this was a big decision, and one it was vitally important I got right.

It was a toss-up between Alexa on Elle, or Emma on Vogue. And much as we all love Alexa, this time Emma won out. She is just too cute! I know opinion is split, but personally I think her pixie-cut is brave, adorable, and the perfect mix of sixties mod and right now.
Emma Watson on British Vogue December 2010

Of course, my rash magazine buying does mean this student will be living on bagels and tinned soup until next week...but what stylish lass wouldn't happily trade a few days of food for Emma?
The glossy white and gold cover is so so wintry, I can already see the fairy lights and sequinned cocktail numbers we'll all be whipping out for the Christmas party season.

Sorry, too soon?


you and me in a photobooth, 1

Thats right, I got moves.
As part of my blog overhaul, new feature! Regular snapshots of life, via iSight ;)



when I was seventeen, I had wrists like steel

aren't these just granny-chic perfect?
somebody, please?

KAMA penny loafers, £55, Topshop



so lets make time work for us

how miserable have I been on this blog of late?
erm, I am heart-stoppingly sorry for my depressing tone :)

Surprisingly, I'm actually not sad! University was a massive shock to the system, especially after I spent all summer avoiding thinking about my imminent departure... but now that I have accepted that this is my new life, it is all going swimmingly. In fact I have been rather busy of late, just doing student things, you know, things involving Jezza Kyle and jaegerbombs and Tesco and Orange Wednesdays and assignments and d
ettol and dubstep. Not all at once, you understand.
Hence the lack of blog activity/unenthusiastic posting.
Also, I am studying creative writing and I don't know if this will make any sense when written down, but I put so much of my creative energy into my work that I feel pretty much sapped of all my best ideas when it comes to free time! This is lazy and slatternly and not acceptable behaviour, for which I apologize.

It has been nice to spend a bit of time catching up on all my favorite blogs though, whilst eating leftover chocolate apples from Halloween and daydreaming about the day I will be able to afford some lipstick from Topshop's new makeup range. I suppose if I didn't eat for a few days...

I am back, I am feeling good, and ready to blog blog blog my way through my first year at Portsmouth.